Eagles Suck: A Survival Guide for Putting up with the Most Idiotic Fans on the Planet

Due to the fact that it's rivalry week and the Giants have a date of vengeance in Philadelphia tomorrow, I decided to dedicate this blog to the benefit of Giants fans. That's right, a survival guide for putting up with Eagles fans. My gift to you...

1) First things first, you must constantly remind them that they've never won a super bowl. You can do that by perhaps saying Eli Manning has more super bowl rings then any Eagles quarterback ever.
2) Change the words of their stupid fight song to a much better tune, "Die Eagles Die" just flows so much better if I do say so myself.
3) They will bring up last years fluke of a win thanks to the worlds luckiest onside kick. They can do that all they want because you can remind them that it will never get better than that. That was their super bowl. A regular season win, congratulations.
4) If they even mention the name Desean Jackson, remind them that he is the softest football player in the history of the game. He may make plays, he may be fast as hell, and he certainly is talented. But he is disgraceful to the game simply based on his approach to football. I don't even think it's safe to call this guy a football player he's more like a track star. I have never once seen him after a catch try and take someone on and lower his shoulder. Long story short he never actually hits anybody. I respect football players that hit people seeing as...it's freaking football.
5) Eagles fans tend to think of pro bowls as something really important. I guess they have to because that's the only time they get to watch their team in the month of February. If they even bring up pro bowls remind them that nobody cares and they're completely meaningless. Not that they can comprehend that obvious fact unfortunately.
6) "Stop living in the past" is something I can gurantee Eagles fans will say in response to anytime you even mention super bowls. Eagles fans say this as a defense mechanism because they're fully aware they have no past. But since they will never get that through their skull lets talk about the present: We're 1-1 and so are you. We have both beaten the same team. You're fluke of a comeback was last year, that's right last year in the past. All that matters is this game right now if you're an Eagles fan right? So let me remind you that we're going to come out with a vengeance and ruin you're homeopener.

That's right baby the "Dream Team" is in for one GIANT nightmare. Let me tell you man we're coming for Vick, this quote from Pierre-Paul is great, "If you want to stay in the pocket, we got something coming for [you]. So I suggest you run. He’s going to be pretty vulnerable. We got to get after him," Pierre-Paul said. "If it takes all 11 to get to him, we’re going to get to him."

WE'RE GOING TO GET HIM. If Pierre-Paul thinks so you know I kind of believe him. Desean can run up the sidelines all we wants when Vick is on his back. And on the offensive side of the ball we got to pound the rock allllllll day. The Eagles cannot stop the run it's very clear. Just ask Cadillac Williams and Michael Turner. Yeah that's right Cadillac Williams ran on the Eagles no problem, I'm pretty sure that's the same dude we shut down on national television last week but I could be wrong...

Giants football. Pass rush. Defense. Run the football. Set the tone. We may be in Philly but there's no doubt in my mind we're going to be playing some Giants football. Because it's about tradition baby something Eagles fans can't understand because they traditionally choke. Lets go man it's time to show some New York Giants pride.

Eagles suck. Vick will not be able to see straight after this game.